It is that time again....

.....that my embies are the most beautiful and fascinating thing I have ever seen

.... that my blackberry is dying a miserable death, meaning its making me miserable, and Verizon sucks for not letting me upgrade earlier than Dec.
....that constipation is one of the worst feelings ever
.....People will always continue to amaze and surprise me every day, some not in a great way
....in good luck charms
....that Halloween is my least favorite holiday
....every women should treat herself to a massage when she really needs it

.....that I happen to have the best furbabies ever, and celebrating their birthdays makes me giddy! Happy 4th Birthday today Jakey!!!!(the poopy in black)

I like the number 5!

I think it looks like a fabulous number!! That is how many embryos I have waiting for me right now. Out of the 7 retrieved yesterday, 6 were mature and 5 fertilized. That is an excellent outcome in my opinion. Also, no waiting around to see how they do, I am scheduled for my transfer on Thursday! The day of my dog Jakey's birthday! So its gotta be a good day, right? A fabulous day to get pregnant.

For some details and answers to questions I've gotten. We are transferring them. This is not the same as implantation. They still have to snuggle in tight and hang on once they are put in. This is the only part of the procedure that they have no control over. I have a nice thick lining though, so I'm sure it will be a wonderful cushioned environment that at least one embie will want to hang out in.

As far as how many we will transfer, well we are 99% we will transfer 2, as long as we still have 2 thriving by then. We will see what the doctor recommends. I suspect he will suggest 1-2.

In the mean time, I am doing a progesterone suppository in the morning, and a pill of estrace, estrogen basically daily. This means one thing shoved up my vag in the morning, and one thing shoved up there at night. My vag is going to be a busy place! However, no sex for Mr. W. Sorry babes, doctor's orders! I go in for my beta test to see if I am pregnant on Monday, Nov. 8th. You can count on me to cheat though. I have a thing for peeing on things. Stay tuned!!

7 is our new lucky number!

Well we had the ER today. I was almost sure they were going to get at least 10 eggs, but they got 7. I know, I know, its a GREAT number, but I'd be lying if I said I wasn't slightly disappointed. I know that the idea is quality over quantity and whoever said that is absolutely right. I know we have 7 quality eggs in there. Rockstars I'd like to call them because I just know we'll get a great report tomorrow.

So what will we find out tomorrow? Well, they will tell us out of those 7, how many were mature, and how many fertilized. Then from there, we will find out when they want to transfer them. Not implant, but transfer. Once they put them back in, they still need to implant. That is the only part of this process they don't have control over.

Now that you're updated, I must go rest. Mr. W has been adorable all day. Started off so nervous for me, and worried. It was cute. Now he is trying to wait on me hand and foot, and even went out and got flowers for me while I was sleeping. He's a keeper!

Another Update and a teaching lesson for y'all

 Monday it is!! Most people dread Mondays. I am not alone on that, unless its my day off during my busy time at work, or I have exciting plans, or I'm one step closer to getting pregnant. Well, that's this Monday!!! Only a couple of days away, and I am scheduled bright and early for my egg retrieval. What is that? Well, there is a video to show you below, but basically they go in, with a tiny needle, and take out the eggs out of my follicles. After today's update we still have 10 really good ones, and smaller ones right there as well. My u/s technician took a guess today at how many eggs we might get. She said 12 plus or minus a few. How exciting!!!

So what happens on Monday when they take away my eggs. Well, they take Mr. W's sperm and fertilize them! Now, some people leave it to chance. Introduce the sperm and the egg, and and let nature take its course. We do not have that option. Not only does Mr. W have a low number of swimmers, some of them are drunk. Not really, but about half of the low number he does have, are not moving or abnormally shaped (square head instead of round) or more than one tail. Just not what we're looking for. So, to avoid the risk of the eggs not fertilizing, or fertilzing with abnormal sperm and then having the embryo not make it, they will be doing a process called ICSI. Intracytoplasmic sperm injection. They actually take a needle and insert one tiny perfect, round head, one tailed sperm into my egg. It is also showed in the video below! This will happen on Monday as well. Mr. W will give his sample, they will take my eggs, and then they will do some embryo making! We should hear on Tuesday how they are doing for our first fertilization report. Then we may be getting one or two of our embryos transferred back in either 3 or 5 days after. So, Thursday or Saturday. To say that I'm excited is an understatement. Mr. W is more on the cautiously optimistic side. Can't say I blame him.

So without further hesitation, here it all is in animated video. It is only about 3 minutes long.  I could explain it you all day, but then again, a picture is worth a thousand words. Video here

I believe...

 











..... that pomegranate juice is best served as a martini with a splash of lime

..... that heart surgery is scary shit but its going to turn out just perfect
......that my day is complete when I make another person laugh or smile
......in the 4 Bs. My Bruised, Bloated, Buddha  Belly is grossing me out right now but it will all be worth it

.....that I am brave, but not that brave. No side views here but trust me, I look 4 months pregnant
.....that family means everything
.....its ok to go to work with your pants unbuttoned and elastic waistbands are severely underrated
.....that I'm getting KU next week

Updates, updates and more updates!

Does anyone even read these? I'm kidding, I know I have some eager readers. Anyway, things went very well today! Blood work looks good! My ute lining is up from 3something to start to now 12something! I knew choking down that pomegranate juice would be helpful. Or maybe it wasn't at all but that's what I keep telling myself so that the upset stomach its giving me isn't for naught.

Right now we're up to at least 10 follicles in the lead, largest being 16 mm. There are several smaller ones that may or may not catch up as well. I go in Friday for another update, and definitely ER date, but its looking like Monday. Hey guys I'm getting KU next week!!! WOOT!!

Update #3

Good but another increase in meds!
I have 7 "lead follicles" that they are looking at right now. There are still several smaller ones that could catch up or be in the running. It is still early and so they upped my dosage again. My lining looks much better too, forming a nice tri-layer as its supposed to. Perfect for those little embies to snuggle in soon. Right now, there is nothing more exciting to tell. I feel ok, minus some lingering headaches, fatigue and stomach aches. The stomach aches are new, and those can go as quickly as they came. More to come on Wednesday!

Update #2

Looks like we're moving in the right direction! However, just a small tweak, as in an increase in dosage. That's ok though. No biggie. I'm still sticking myself with needles, yes plural, every night so a change in dosage is just a minor detail.

So at this point, the lining is a little thin. The u/s tech saw some fluid in there so it may just be because I just had AF and its early in my cycle. I have bought some wonderful tasting pomegranate juice to help spruce things up a bit in there. Hey, its good for me at least!

13 is the magic number today. Number of follies that is. I am good with that number. Now I just need them to grow and all grow together at similar rates like they are supposed to.


Oh and I totally figured out how I feel in the mornings when I wake up. Something like this....

Yes. My head hurts, I feel fuzzy, and I just want to go back to sleep. Just like I drank a whole bottle (or 2) of wine or champagne the night before. Every day. Some days its like I only had one glass too many. Some mornings it is comparable to having one bottle too many.

Well the BCP were good for one thing.

Ok maybe 2.
It gave me clear, beautiful skin. Seriously, I skipped the gross acne in my teen years but I think now I'm making up for it. It was bad this summer, holding steady this fall, disappeared on the bcp, and has greeted me again. Lovely. I have Orien's belt of acne on my cheeks.

The other plus, was the feeling not so bloated feeling. Yep, felt skinny on those pills. Ironic, no?

My friend started this idea and I must say I happen to love it. She has a fabulous blog, please check her out!

So, here I go.

I believe....

that my e-friends are some of the most amazing, inspiring, and supportive women and my life has changed for the better just getting to know all of them.

that I need to meet more of my e-friends.

that every bruise, bleed, and needle stick will be worth it.

that Dunkin Donuts is the best coffee ever.

that animals have the most amazing way of turning your frown upside down when you need it most.

that is perfectly acceptable that I have eaten most of my weight watchers points, only in the form of cookies  and its only 2pm.                                    

Baseline appointment update

WOOT! It all looks good so far!! Waiting on the b/w and my instructions, however the u/s was great! Lining looks good and for a follie count, we have 6 on the right and "at least" 4 on the left. I will take it! Next appointment is Friday.

Can I just say I am so flippin excited!? Really, bring it on because I am ready to get pregnant!!

UPDATE! Got the call and we start stimming tonight!! I also start a couple other pills and take my antibiotic tonight as well as Mr. W. Its a one time, mix the liquid and powder together and down it shot. Looks like it will be his and hers antibiotic shots together tonight!

War wounds

Crappy cell phone pic but you get the idea. The bruise was from 2 nights ago, last night was flawless on the other side, and went back to this side. That bandaid is to prevent the bloody mess. Another war wound will be showing up. Good thing no one has to see that area!

::Throws out bcp::

Last one taken today!! WOOT WOOT!! I was about as excited to throw them away and be done with them this time, as I was, way back when in May of 2008. Back when I was naive enough to think we were two young, healthy, fertile people who would be making a baby in no time. No, not us. The universe has other plans for us. They wanted us to learn some life lessons first. I truly believe that we had to learn just a bit more patience, and a bit more appreciation for each other first. I believe all these life lessons will allow us to be better parents. We will be appreciating all the little things that are taken for granted far too often. That's ok though. We all have different roads taken and different paths in our journey. They shape us and form us into the individuals, partners, parents, friends, family that we are supposed to be. I know I have grown immensely in this past year and a half, as I've seen Mr. W change and grow as well. It actually makes me smile most days. All for a better cause, all for the family we're meant to have.

Ouch.

For the love of God. Injections are going ok. For some reason the first one didn't hurt, but the rest haven't been so nice to me. Not super painful but definitely not fun. Tonight, I bled. Like there is a bandaid on my belly bleeding. WTF.

Also, I woke up today felt like I got run over by a truck. I felt better as the day went on. So, either the side effects are setting in OR I'm getting sick. Either way, its to bed I go. 9pm is a great bed time me thinks!

3 days in

I'm doing good! For some reason, the first injection didn't hurt, then the second one did a little, and the third one did the most. Why is it hurting more? I thought yesterday hurt because I didn't take my time as much and was a little too cocky about it. Tonight I went slow and it hurt the most. I also stopped mid poke. Duh.

Anyway, so far, no side effects. I have been drinking water like usual, in hopes that it will help stave off any headaches. Hopefully they don't pop up when I go back to work. **fingers crossed**

What a week! Let the games begin...

Well let me just say that all in all it was a great week. I had a wonderful appointment on Tuesday, learning how to inject myself. I met with the lady that does my monitoring appointments. She was so very helpful, and willing to answer any questions I had. Found out what I should do regarding exercise, my abnormal papsmear that needed to be scheduled, and how the monitoring appointments work. Anytime I get some answers to questions about this process it is a great thing.

Today, I had my papsmear. For those that don't know, I had an abnormal pap in Feb. and had to do a colposcopy with a biopsy. Luckily, it did not go any further into other procedures such as a LEEP, which I'm all too familiar with, just instructions to follow up in 6 months. So that was me today. It was great to see my midwife. She is just an absolute doll. She never rushes me, takes time to listen, and was truly interested to hear what we've been doing since I last saw her regarding our journey to have a family. She told me three times that she was sending prayers of pregnancy for me. I truly am lucky to connect so well with the medical professionals in my life.

So tonight, was my first injection of Lupron. I have to do the injections myself because Mr. W is askeeered of needles! LOL Anyway, I got soooo nervous about doing it right before I had to. I just stood there thinking "I don't wanna!!" But, I finally sucked it up and pushed that needle in. It didn't hurt!!! Now, however, its red, stinging and swelled up like I have a mosquito bite but seriously y'all I feel so much better getting that first shot out of the way. I CAN DO THIS!!!!!